CHAPTER XXIII

Ko Shan telephoned her two days later and told her to go to a certain address the next afternoon.. It was a large, quiet house set on a lawn in an expensive residen¬tial district in the old French Quarter. Converted into an office but not labeled with official signboards, it had soldiers standing guard outside the wrought iron gate- After being interviewed first by a secretary and searched. by a guard, she was admitted into Sheng Kai-fu's presence-
Afterwards she wondered if she ought to ring Ko Shah up to tell her how the interview went and to thank her again- Perhaps it would be expected of her. It would be common politeness. But Ko Shan had made it quite plain that she did not welcome telephone calls.
Then something happened which made any further contact with Ko Shan quite out of question. The Libera tion Daily News got into trouble- Ko Shan's chief, Yuin Yih-ch'u.n, had been arrested for corruption. Su Nan heard a lot about it over in her office although the newspapers withheld the news until weeks later when he was,

openly charged with "embezzling JMP$220,000,000; engaging in speculations with businessmen as partners and receiving gifts from subordinates that amounted to over JMPS10,000,000." Furthermore, "he is connected with the landlord class through a thousand fibers and ten thousand filaments," the papers said grimly. (Yuin came out of this unscathed, was merely transferred.)
The lunar New Year was drawing near- The Kuomintang had prohibited its celebration in an effort to enforce the solar calendar. And during the war years the permanent curfew outlawed the lighting of firecrackers because they sounded too much like gunfire- But now it was considered all right again, since the holiday had been renamed the Farmers' New Year. And yet somehow fewer firecrackers were heard than when setting them off had been illegal. Especially this year, when all the shops and most families were in the throes of the Five Anti. Still, the New Year was the New Year. Toward the middle twentieth of the twelfth moon there was often heard at night the spatter of explosives sending the kitchen god to heaven in style for his annual report on the establishment. Su Nan felt jumpy at every volley, trying not to think of Tsui P'ing, who had been shot.
The sound of firecrackers also made her feel more alone than ever in the strange city- If this thing had happened to Liu in Peking she wouldn't feel that she had nobody to turn to. She had her family and relatives, and the professors in her university used to be very generous to the students, going to great lengths to help them. Then there were the professors of Peita under whom Liu had studied. Of course it was different now. Families and relatives were no longer quite so willing to take your troubles upon their shoulders. And the professors were frightened people who had to be more careful than anybody else. This would be precisely the kind of thing they would avoid like the plague. Still she wished she was in Peking.
The imminence of the New Year was almost threatening The last days of the year had a way of crowding upon you. Because there was not much time left and because it was so cold, people scurried on the road laden with big and small parcels wrapped with coarse yellow paper tied with straw, bringing home ingredients for the New Year feast — salted pork, mushrooms, lung ssu, thin silvery noodles. The sight of them isolated her in her distress.
She had come to know this part of town quite well, travelling back and forth from Sheng Kai-fu's office and the bus station almost every day. It was very much like going to see a fashionable doctor, she thought the first time she went there. Sheng had. seemed so preoccupied, she remembered, sitting at his desk listening to her account of the case. Telephone calls kept interrupting her. When he was talking on the phone, she sat very still, trying to efface herself completely, because what was being said might be important secrets which he wouldn't want anybody to hear. She stared at the glass of tea on his desk- Imprisoned under the glass lid a white jasmine was drifting very slowly down through the yellowish green twilight of the tea and another flower was rising, both with the utter purposelessness and unconcern of clouds. As he talked into the phone his eyes rested on her, vacant and unwavering. When she finally made a slight uneasy movement to look back at him, he shifted his vacant stare to a piece of furniture beyond her.
He promised to make inquiries for her and shook hands without rising when she was leaving. Just then the telephone rang again. Picking it up and speaking into it, he seemed to have forgotten to release her hand. She stood awkwardly by his desk looking down at the oily

separate strands of thin hair on the balding top of his head, each strand distinct over the greenish pallor of scalp. The thick black rim of his glasses came out from under the black wings of long hair over his ears- She felt stifled with her hand buried in the warm padded softness of his fat hand as if she was standing neck deep in mud. It took all her will power. to keep smiling and to wait a while before she pulled away.
She came back the next day as she had been instructed. But he seemed very vague. She wondered if he had remembered to make inquiries. He asked her the same questions all over again — she was sure he had never got them straight the first time. She told him she was engaged to Liu and he asked her about her past history, family background, the schools and university she had gone to, how she had been admitted into the Corps and the jobs she had held. It was understandable that she too was under suspicion. In any case, the more questions asked, the more hopeful it seemed.
When she apologized for the amount of time he had wasted on her, the third or fourth time she called, he said smiling, "I always have time for young people. It's a sad thing for a revolutionary worker to lose touch with young people. After all, the Revolution is more for the benefit of your generation than for anybody else. Mustn't forget that."
That was the day he had told her he had made arrangements for her to meet a Comrade Li. He seemed unwilling to describe Li as being in charge of the Three Anti cases. "He has a better grasp of the Three Anti material than I do," he said warily. "You'll have a chance to tell him about Liu. And he might be able to give you some information. I'm asking him down for dinner this evening so you can talk to him-"
"This evening?" She heard herself saying almost
automatically, without the slightest tell-tale pause, "But. I won't be able to get away this evening. There's a special meeting." She knew from experience that to be convincing, quickness counted more than the perfection of the excuse.
But he laughed cynically, with justifiable annoyance,, "Aah, surely you have to take time out to eat? It won't. take long — Li is a busy man too."
"Can I go and see him at his office, do you think?". she asked miserably. "Perhaps if I say you sent me -- "
"I don't think he has time for visitors just now," Sheng said brusquely. "He's terribly rushed."
After she left she was tormented by self-reproach.. When she came again the next day after a sleepless night, she felt a little incredulous that he received her as usual-
"I had a talk with Li yesterday," he told her. "About your friend's case." He looked reflectively at the glass., of tea in front of him, twirling the glass lid around slightly, holding it by its knob. The broken squeak of glass scraping against glass grated on her in the sudden stillness.
"He's definitely mixed up with Tsui P'ing. Acted as Tsui's claws and teeth in several instances," Sheng said. "And so far he's refused to confess- You know, of course,. that makes it more serious."
She did not really hear what else he said- She listened with frightful concentration, spongily absorbing every sword and intonation, only to have it all spread and run into each other. Something about his special concern for her. He had been treating her as a special case, he said. But when she begged again for help, he sipped his tea, lapsed back into his relaxed absentmindedness-
Coming out into the street she wondered if she ought to telephone Ko Shan - defy for once the tacit quarantine imposed on all employees- of the Liberation Daily News. Numbly she turned down the idea. It soon pop

pad up again in her dazed mind as if she had never thought of it before. Again she turned it down- But even if there wasn't anything I go Shan could do, she wanted to tell her what had happened. She had a great need to tell somebody — anybody- Only the facts, which were simple enough: Sheng hadn't got anything definite for her until today, when he had told her the bad news. She wanted to hear herself tell the story straight, unembellished by all the details about Sheng's tones and expressions which might be pure imagination on her part.
If it was nothing, why had she refused to have dinner with him and that Comrade Li she was to meet? -when she had known how important that was and how offended he would feel. She had regretted it bitterly afterwards. But if she had gone to dinner, would Li have turned up? Was there a Li in the first place? Would it be at Sheng's house or one of the apartments he had taken over? — The trouble with her was that she had an inflamed, hyper-sensitive ego from dealing with the men who had made passes at her, she told herself. The first time she came into contact with anyone high up enough to be referred to as a thou Mang, head leader, and she thought he was up to the same tricks.
The man walking in front of her had come up from the country with wild ducks to sell for the New Year. To leave his hands free he carried the dead ducks on his back, their necks bunched together and sewn on his worn old padded jacket of chalk- striped grey cloth. The ducks' bills pressed flatly and snugly against the back of his thin shoulder- Their bodies, a glossy black-green with touches of light blue and copper on the wings, made a little feather cape that swung a bit as he walked- Su Nan tried not to look at it, the way it swung heavy and bright, a few steps ahead of her.
There must have been a market here earlier on in
the day. The road was wet and littered- Frozen, spoilt cabbage leaves lay pasted on the sidewalk in big green patches, the rotted spots turned transparent in the pale green.
It seemed to her that the most he could do was refuse to help her. Would he go to the extent of damaging Liu's case? And what would that get him if she were to remain stubborn? He wouldn't want to risk a scandal at a time like this, with the Three Anti on. Though the fact the 'Three Anti was going on did make it much less trouble to destroy a person than to save him — perhaps no trouble at all for one in Sheng's position-
She had often had this feeling as a child when she had done something disastrous, smashing a treasured vase, losing her coat or her school fees- Nothing could be helped — but there must be something she could do, something that just eluded her, something she had to reach for with desperate need.
It could be that Sheng had been telling the truth when he said Liu's situation was critical, and was merely withholding his help unless she proved more tractable. It would make no difference actually. But at least that would mean that Liu was in danger for his life. It wasn't as if he would have been all right but for her meddling.
Sickening, she thought — the deviousness and cunning of the way her mind worked. But she would rather die than think that if anything was to happen to Liu, it was she who had killed him.
The little dark green cape of ,duck feathers swayed a little from side to side, thick and slow, always suspended in front of her. A grocery shop along the way was sunning Jung ssu on the sidewalk, big coils of thin brittle silver wire, magnificant nests of some fairy bird. Su Nan stepped around them with exaggerated, drunken care.
She felt the sun through her hair. Her hair felt thin

with the sun on it- At this moment she hated and despised the self-contained integrity of her being, the mild, unthinking pleasure she took in the consciousness of her person, the movements of her limbs inside her padded uniform.
But what guarantee would she get -- even if Liu was immediately set free, it meant nothing. She had a relative who had been arrested on suspicion of counter-revolutionary activities. He had been released after several months and arrested again within two weeks. Since then he had been in and out of jail several times, travelling in a well-greased rut- It was not like in the days of the warlords when the country was split and it was possible to flee from one sphere of influence to another. Nowadays the whole country lay stretched out like an open palm,. ready to close around any one person at any minute-
She had thought she was prepared. to throw herself' into the breach, damming the darkness flooding over Liu.. And yet, now that the sacrifice had turned into mere atonement, she found herself running away from it, outraged and resentful- Running away, crying out for Liu.